Engine Transplants

One of the cool things about hot rodding, is transplanting a better engine in an existing car.  The concept has been around for decades--people have been dropping bigger, more powerful engines in everything with wheels, since at least the end of World War II.  Transplanting a small block Chevy or Ford V8 is the most common thing, but you'll also see people use everything from Oldsmobile Rockets, Chrysler Hemis, and Buick Turbos or Nailheads, to more exotic fare like Jaguars, Ferraris and Lamborghinis.



The most successful example of this concept is the AC/Shelby Cobra.  In the early 1960s, Carroll Shelby took a British roadster, the AC Ace, and dropped a 260 cubic inch Ford V8 into it.  The result was the birth of the legendary Shelby Cobra, which dominated the sports car racing scene.  Today, original Cobras exchange hands for prices ranging from the high six-figures up into millions of dollars.

In the spirit of hot rod engine transplants, here are five cars, I would love to perform surgery on.  I doubt any of these cars would fetch Cobra money, but they would be fun to own.



1. The 1963-65 Buick Riviera.  The first generation Riviera is one of the best designs to come out of Detroit.  Styled by Bill Mitchell, it was his interpretation of what would happen if you crossed a Ferrari with a Rolls Royce.  The original car had either a 401 or 425 cubic inch Buick Nailhead V8, which provided decent power for its time.  But today's minivan has more power and would embarrass the Riviera at the drag strip.  However, if you dropped in a modern GM crate motor and transmission, you could easily rectify the situation.



2. The Jensen Interceptor.  Originally matched with a Mopar 383 or 440 V8 and three speed automatic, I can't help wonder what this car would be like with the modern Hemi and a six speed manual.  Or would a powertrain from a Viper fit?  Either way, an updated Interceptor would give a modern Aston Martin a run for its money, while being much cooler to drive.



3. Ponitac Fiero GT.  GM finally got the Fiero right... and then they cancelled it.  I wonder what it would be like if you dropped in a V6 from a Toyota Camry.  The idea really isn't that far fetched--Toyota and GM collaborated for years on cars like the Toyota Corolla/Geo Prisim and more recently the Toyota Matrix/Pontiac Vibe.  Plus, if the Camry's V6 is good enough for the new Lotus Evora, it should be good for the Fiero.



4. Fiat X1/9.  A mid-engine car and contemporary to the Pontiac Fiero, the X1/9 was largely dismissed as a hair-dresser's car because it was grossly underpowered.  But it looks exotic, which is no suprise since the car was penned by Marcello Gandini, who also designed the Lancia Stratos, Lamborghini Miura, and Lamborghini Countach.  All it really needs is more power--something in the form of a modern Fiat Abarth powertrain, or one of any number of Honda/Acura four cylinder engines.



5. Delorean.  The weak link in any Delorean is its under-powered Renault V6, which is ironic because John Delorean made his name as the father of the original Pontiac GTO.  Today Deloreans are prized for their originality, so it would be a sacrilege to replace the engine.  But that doesn't stop me from dreaming what a small block Chevy V8, or even something as exotic as a Ferrari V8 out of a wrecked F355 would do for the car's performance.              

The $15,000 Question: Acura TSX

Honda probably sells ten Accords for every one Acura TSX in the United States.  But ironically, the Acura TSX IS the Honda Accord in other parts of the world.



Still, if you're looking for a leaner, sharper Honda sedan, one with a the rev-happy 2.4 liter VTEC engine from the S2000 roadster, but don't care for the boy racer Civic with its split instrument panel, you're in luck.

I always felt the 200-2012 Honda Accord was a little too ponderous, especially compared to the 1996 Accord I owned back in the 1990's.  That Accord, with it's high revving four cylinder and precise 5-speed manual gear box, always felt more like a poor man's BMW to me.  Similarly equipped, the Acura TSX has that same precision and feels like a direct decendant to the old Accord.

Power!

Jeremy Clarkson, the lead presenter for BBC's "Top Gear" television show, is famous for shouting POWER! His yawp is usually reserved for cars by Mercedes and Lamborghini with massive power. But I think even he would agree that the power made by the latest four and six cylinder engines is astonishing.

When I was a kid, 200 horsepower was a lot. Most V8s of the early 1980s struggled to reach that number. The Corvette put out between 230-250 horsepower. Same with the Porsche 928, which for a time was the fastest car you could buy in the US. Now you have four cylinder engines that make that amount reliably thanks to turbocharging, and multi-valve direct injection. Six cylinder engines producing 300+ horsepower are not uncommon. Cars like the Chevy Camaro, Ford Mustang, and various Hyundais and Nissans put out that level of power and offer the same level of performance as V8s from just a few years ago.

It truly is exciting times for internal combustion. With smaller, more efficient and more powerful engines coming to market each year, I can't wait to see what's next.

Buick Regal, Sports Sedan

I'm having a hard time saying Buick Regal and sports sedan in the same sentence with a straight face. It's an oxymoron, but that's what GM is positioning the Regal as for its relaunch next year.

To be fair the new Regal will be based on the Opel Insignia, which has won accolades in Europe. Buick is also undertaking a huge effort to remake itself, much like Cadillac did ten years ago. And the new LaCrosse makes me think they're on to something.

Still, to position the car to compete with Acura, BMW and Infiniti, and use a stodgy nameplate like the Regal, is like Country musician Taylor Swift changing her name to Blanche or Patsy. Yes, there's a history there, but the connotation is not attractive. Buick has better names for a sports sedan like the Wildcat or Gran Sport. The Regal hasn't been cool since the Grand National came out 25 years ago, and people who own those cars don't call them Regals.

I hope Buick is successful. But to be successful, I think they need an attitude car, or halo car as it's known in the industry. Something like the Grand National that will draw Acura customers into the showroom and leave with a new Regal or LaCrosse.

I Miss Pop-Up Lights

Although the 1980s are not considered a high watermark of automotive design there was one element from that era that is missing today. Pop-up headlights.

Pop-up and hidden lights originated in the 1930s with cars like the Cord 810 and the Buick Y-Job concept car. They reappeared in the 1960s on the Corvette, Buick Rivera, Pontiac GTO and Dodge Charger. Before long they spread to Italian makes like Lamborghini, Ferrari and Alfa Romeo. But they were the most prevalent in the 1980s, appearing on everything from exotic cars to Hondas and Toyotas. They came in all styles and shapes, from ones that flipped up, like on the Honda Prelude, to ones that rotated 180 degrees like on the Corvette C4. There were also exposed pop-up lights like the ones on the Porsche 928 and the 1982 Toyota Celica that I owned in college.

Fifteen years later, pop-up lights have all but vanished. The last new car with pop-ups was either the 1997-2004 Corvette or Lotus Esprit. I know a big reason they went away is cost. Fixed lights are cheaper to produce and less expensive to repair. They also weigh less and take up less space. And like most styling trends, they were a bit of a fad as well, like tail fins, digital instruments and talking cars. But like most fads, it's only a matter of time before they reappear. If the Chevrolet Camaro, Ford Mustang, and Dodge Challenger are any indicator, I suspect we'll see pop-up lights again in the near future.

Same Old GM

This week GM trotted out the Chevy Volt again. This time to announce the car gets a stunning 239 mpg as estimated by the EPA. Whether the Volt gets 239 mpg or just half that number, it’s a major achievement. But there is one problem with the Volt. It’s made by GM.

Forty years ago, GM made cars that were aspirations. In the days they controlled 50% of the market, their cars were beautifully styled and well made. People were proud to own a Chevrolet. Pontiacs were bad boys in muscle shirts. A Buick or Oldsmobile in the driveway indicated you were squarely middle class. With a Cadillac, you were someone to be reckoned with.

GM lost its way in the 1970s. With the oil embargo, strict emission standards, and labor strikes it stopped dictating the market and began second guessing itself. Innovation was stifled by a heavy handed corporate culture that made the Soviet Politburo look like Google. Lately GM has started to recover some of its edge. Cadillac and Chevrolet are making good vehicles again and even Buick is showing signs of life.

But the product gestation period is too long. It takes GM at least five years to launch a new vehicle, twice as long as most other companies. And GM flaunts their cars years before they are ready. Cars like the Camaro and Volt are old news before they are finally launched. I get that the drive train technology for the Volt needs time to be developed, but five years for a Camaro that looks like a cartooned evil twin of the 1969 model?

C'mon GM.

In Praise of the Beater

Henry David Thoreau wrote about the futility of acquiring material wealth. If he were alive today, his argument would apply to cars as well. Thoreau would be appalled with our car culture, shunning it for public transportation. But if he had to drive, I’m sure he would own a beater.

A beater is the car equivalent of a horse at a glue factory. Its value fluctuates depending on how much gas is in the tank. Usually people who drive beaters are a flat tire away from permanent bus ridership. But not always. Sometimes a person drives a beater because they like the car too much to part with it. Or a person may view car payments with the same disdain Thoreau had for paying taxes. Aspiring race car drivers or people restoring a car drive beaters so they can spend money on their other car. Celebrities sometimes drive beaters to blend in anonymously. Sometimes the person driving the car in front of you, with a bumper sticker that says “My other car is a Porsche,” really does own a Porsche.

Most of the cars I owned were beaters. My hand-me-down Olds Cutlass and the VW Thing qualify. I also had a Buick Century which was an especially good beater; one I took for granted until I sold it. The Buick was roomy, comfortable, the air conditioning worked and it got great gas mileage. It wore peeling paint, a GM factory option at the time, and no hubcaps. When I drove it, traffic parted for me like I was Moses at the Red Sea.

A few years ago, the Buick began ringing up large repair bills. I decided I’d had enough and bought a brand new Hyundai Sonata. The Sonata was a great car. I liked the styling, which was criticized for looking like a funky Korean Jaguar, and liked rowing the Porsche licensed Tiptronic gearbox. Compared to the Buick, the Sonata was a joy to drive and in two years of ownership, nothing ever went wrong.

After a while, driving a new car began to wear on me. At work, I parked on the street downtown and mysterious scuffs would appear. My kids spilled milk and Teddy Grahams in the backseat. I realized I was leading a life of quiet desperation and car payments, so I put the Sonata up for sale and began looking for another beater.

I looked at Hondas and Toyotas, but the ones in my price range were shot to hell or looked like rejects from “The Fast and the Furious”. I looked at GM cars, but couldn’t bring myself to own another wobbly land yacht. One day I stumbled across a ten year-old Infiniti I30 with less than a hundred thousand miles on it. I remembered it was the same basic car as the Nissan Maxima but better looking. Curious to why it was in my price range, I called the owner who informed me it had slight hail damage. Two hours later, I brought it home.

The Infiniti is too nice to be described as a beater. Everything works and I wouldn’t hesitate to drive it on a two thousand mile road trip. It’s more rewarding to drive than the Sonata and has leather seats and a sunroof. I don’t mind parking on the streets or in the sun. I don’t cringe anymore when I hear, “Uh oh, Daddy! I spilled!”. And even though it’s black, I don’t feel the insatiable need to keep it washed. But it does clean up well and I’m not ashamed to take my wife out in public in it.

For me the Infiniti is the best of both worlds. Thoreau would not approve. But he might appreciate it, if he knew it saved me from the quiet desperation of car payments.